Month 39 - Recap

Well. We've reached a momentous milestone, my boy. I made it six years and two-and-a-half months before I had to make a call to Poison Control. Not bad, I say. Much like your sister, you like to dilly-dally in the bathroom. For some reason, in your mind, the short distance from the toilet to the stool at the sink (approximately 18") is long enough to warrant daydreaming. I haven't been three in a really long time, so maybe that's legit. Either way, it's not uncommon for you to be in the bathroom for a long time.

A few weeks ago, I went to check on you (after many many minutes in the bathroom) and you were standing at the stool about to put toothpaste on your toothbrush. I'm all for oral hygiene, but it was the middle of the morning, you had already brushed your teeth after breakfast, so I told you that you didn't need to brush your teeth right then. You looked bummed, but you handed me back the tube of toothpaste. And it felt lighter. A LOT lighter. I knew this because it was brand-stinkin'-new less than 24 hours ago.

Me: *looking all around the counter, the toilet, the trashcan - EVERYwhere - for the missing toothpaste*
Me: Buddy, where on Earth is all the toothpaste? This was a brand new tube!
You: I ate it, Mommy!
Me: Um, you WHAT?
You: I ate it! It was yummy!
Me: You can't EAT toothpaste!
You: What?
Me: NO! You can't eat it!
You: Really??
Me: Yes! It's not FOOD! You're not supposed to eat things that aren't food!
You: *looking as sad as if I just told you we had to get rid of all your Legos* Oh.

It's at this time where your well-intentioned sister hears our conversation, pops into the bathroom, and reads the toothpaste tube.

Natalie: But Mommy, it says right here that it's safe to swallow! So he's fiiiiiiiiiine. Relax, Mommy!
Me: It's safe each time he brushes his teeth. The serving size for the whole tube isn't ONE.
Me: *wondering why I'm trying to reason with a six-year-old*

So I talk to a nice man named Hugh at Poison Control. He assures me that since the toothpaste was fluoride-free, you would probably be fine. That the worst thing would be that your stomach would be upset.

BTW: Thanks for nothing, Elmo and your enticing Berry Blast.

In cuter news, I introduced you and Natalie to the movie Elf this past Christmas. You immediately loved it. And now, at bedtime, instead of giving me a simple "Love you, Mommy", you go full-on Buddy with "And guess what! I love you, I love you, I LOOOOOOOVE YOUUUU!" It's the best ever and wouldn't mind at all if you kept that up for the next 10 or 75 years.

Hugs and smooches,
Mommy & Daddy

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